The 72-Hour Tally

-Two weeks' worth of baking consumed
-Yards of gift wrap demolished
-Hours of games played
-Stains from cranberry wassail, red wine and a bloody nose (dry air) removed from the carpet
-Three trips to the airport

What a wonderful time celebrating as a family!

We enjoyed a special Christmas together, despite snow and ice, traffic snarls, mishaps and mayhem. Way too short, but decidedly better than wishing people would have left sooner. :)

Can it be Christmas again next week?

TA-DA!

It's official - we're making progress in the settling process. 

The flattened boxes have been sent away, the old computer desk given away, and yesterday Bruce was able to get both vehicles into the garage.

This is a big accomplishment. It means no scraping windshields in the morning (yes, it does get frosty down here).  We are glad the Camry is small, because this garage is a 2-car garage. Not a 2-van garage, and certainly not a 2-1/2 vehicle garage like we had in Iowa. Bruce is tightening his "space belt" and resigning himself to a smaller collection of stuff. The jury is still out on whether we keep the upright freezer. It may wind up in the laundry room yet.

Yesterday we delivered pizza and Christmas cookies for lunch to a family Bruce knows from work, arriving just as their moving truck was pulling away.  We know the feeling of being surrounded by boxes and strangers. Timing was perfect; we ate, laughed, commiserated, compared war stories and celebrated the hard-earned growth that change brings. It was something akin to church. :)

The Oddest Things

OK, complete transparency here. The oddest things can trigger the strongest emotional reactions in me. I almost started to cry when the bored looking county office worker plunked our new Tennessee license plates on the counter today. (I am glad that at least they are attractive.) She had no idea that this was actually a traumatic moment for me - in a somewhat official way, becoming a tax-paying Tennessean instead of the lifelong Iowan I am. It felt very final. And maybe a little like a betrayal.

But I still feel like an Iowan - at least the single-digit weather doesn't bother me, and Bruce was one of the few who actually went to work yesterday with the inch of snow on the ground. Schools had a late start today because of the cold - it was 9 degrees this morning, the likes of which haven't been seen in years. Several people have suggested that we are responsible for bringing the cold weather down here from Iowa.

If we had that kind of influence on the world I'm thinking we'd do something different than bringing snow and frigid temps - we just got boxes hauled away today so we could get one car into the garage, and scraping windows isn't a good time, North or South.

'snow fair!

Yes, it's snowing here too.

Bruce and I went downtown to take in the "Dickens of a Christmas" festival, which bears some resemblance to the Muscatine Christmas Stroll (without the Symphony), except they expect 50,000 people in Franklin for the 2-day event. The outdoor vendors and folks in period vintage costumes were drenched in a couple of inches of rain yesterday, and when we ventured out in the snow today, we estimated about 200 brave souls on the streets, not including the shivering collection of school children performing on the outdoor stage with their recorders. I'm pretty sure the Muscatine folks would have considered 29 degrees rather balmy and come out 5000 strong, although Miss Louise School of Dance always performs indoors. 

What a difference a few degrees of latitude make! The next door neighbors are outside taking pictures and throwing snowballs (you have to scrape to get enough - we've only had about 3/4" so far).  Apparently, this is a big deal.  The folks in the car next to us downtown were using a fast food drink holder tray to scrape off their car windows. We offered the use of one of our scrapers/brushes, but they thought they were doing OK with their makeshift cardboard.

Neighbors across the street asked us to pick up their newspaper and mail while they are away this weekend - we view that as a reasonable sign that we're starting to settle. We also had the locksmith in to re-key all the locks because we have no idea who has keys (a cleaning service, for sure) to the house. Seemed a responsible thing to do.

Off for a Sunday afternoon nap!

Haven't Found It Yet

The boys once had a B-B pistol that became such a nuisance that I hid it from them. I must have done a really good job, or else one of them found it and then lost it in the woods because it hasn't shown up yet in all the moving boxes. I looked for it before we left Muscatine and couldn't locate it, and I can't think for the life of me where I would have stashed it. I found the ammo for it, but no pistol. (I'll probably find it in a box of sweaters or something.) Oh well!

Two lovely surprises - received a call and had coffee yesterday afternoon with a couple we know from Muscatine who are relocating to the area, and then discovered that a couple from Ames - the woman who served as our wedding coordinator (and her husband was on Bruce's PhD committee) live about 2 miles up the road from us!  Amazing! Made for a day with lots of smiles.

Measuring Life

I have one of those (please don't call it cheesy) pieces of wall art proclaiming, "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." I'm still trying to find the nails so I can hang it up.

I suppose many people read "moments that take our breath away" and think of wonderful moments, or thrilling moments, or those that cause awe, gratitude or joy. But I think there are defining moments in life of equal or greater importance which take our breath away like a sucker punch, knocking us off dead center, looking for all the world like there is nothing good that could result. And those moments probably have a greater and more lasting impact on us than the ones that make us smile.

In part, that's because it's where I see God show up more clearly.

In good times, it's easy enough to bask in the fun of the moment, but it is in those hard places, those moments when it's tough to catch my breath, that God shows Himself in His compassion and adequacy. I've physically had the wind knocked out of me a couple of times in my life, and for the most part, all I could do was lie on the ground waiting for my breath to come back.

When events or circumstances knock me to the ground and leave me sucking wind, it's gratifying to know that no pain is wasted, no experience is squandered by the One Who redeems my "breath-taking" moments.

Small World

The book club was marvelous.

Envision a tiny 100-year-old cottage with uneven brick floors covered with wool rugs, kitschy decor and ingenious use of every imaginable space. The living room is a collection of eclectic furniture, art pieces and book shelves. Now, infuse the scene with a roaring fireplace, innumerable candles, and 18 gabbing women balancing Christmas china, sitting on rickety chairs, cushions, the wooden staircase and you're there. Our hostess was an energetic sprite in leggings, a wool tunic and Keen sandals, fiercely belying her almost 80 years. Did I say loud? Yes, she was loud. And loving. And great fun.

And in my conversations with Lou, another guest, I discovered that she is well acquainted with a couple from Muscatine who happened to be the parents of Emily's closest high school chum. We were amazed by the connection.  And I was relieved that several women played "Dirty Santa" and stole from each other the book I had brought for the gift exchange, conferring honor on it as a desirable offering. Gratifying. (Evidence Not Seen, by Darlene Deibler Rose)

The next night I attended the Nutro Christmas party where I struck up a conversation with a woman who had moved to Tennessee from Mattoon, IL.  I know one person, Jan, who lives there - we worked together at the Ames Tribune about 30 years ago. And again, I was flabbergasted to learn that the woman I was chatting with knew Jan well. In some small way, these little connections are weaving threads that reattach me to my moorings, relinking me to "known-ness." Wonderful.

And this weekend Bruce and I visited 3 churches. The good news is that we were effectively able to rule one out. I'm pretty sure my ears are still bleeding from the volume of the music from last one we visited. Fine teaching, but way loud. One down, 299 to go.

Getting in the Groove

So my kids think I'm busier than they are - well, maybe this week I am.

We had house guests Sunday night through yesterday, which was lovely. Tonight Bruce and I went to a Christmas concert, "Behold the Lamb" by Andrew Peterson (http://andrew-peterson.com/index.php). Wonderful musicianship, poetic lyrics and powerful tunes, altogether enjoyable.

I contacted a woman who hosts a monthly book discussion/potluck group in her cottage. The next gathering is tomorrow night, so I'm on for that.  Made some cranberry salsa today (thanks, Em) so the flavors will be melded by tomorrow night. The January book is actually one I borrowed from our Muscatine neighbor the day before we left (Three Cups of Tea) so I won't have to scrounge up a copy. I asked the hostess if the group was just a front for an excuse to eat out - she howled with laughter. Busted!

And Friday night is the Nutro Christmas party somewhere in downtown Nashville, so this will be my first foray into the city. Hope our ideas of "dress up" match!  If not, I'll be more comfortable than they will. :) For sure, it will be an event for the Garmin.  The Nashville Christmas parade starts at the same time as the party, in close proximity. Detours are guaranteed.

I have been exercising my first and foremost right - that of choosing what I dwell on, one of the few things in life over which I have a bit of control. I am pushing through melancholy and home sickness with the realization that what I rehearse in my mind impacts my day. It has been a marvelous comfort to remember God's faithfulness and goodness.  Couple those truths with a mug of Earl Grey tea and it's almost grounds for a celebration!

For the Birds

Back in the 1940s there was an enchanting song written about "when the swallows come back to Capistrano" but there must be some kind of unlovely difference between swallows and robins.  For the past week we've had hundreds of dive bombing robins taking up residence in our neighborhood. Apparently they are migrating south for the winter and every year they make a stop in Franklin...on our street. It's sort of been like the Alfred Hitchcock movie. I didn't feel sorry for the one that attacked our car and lost.

We are making progress on our boxes. We have about 15 boxes left and then the stuff for the walls.  Yesterday Bruce bagged up about 6 dumpster loads of paper for the recycling center. Today we tackled some yard work. There were bushes that were in serious need of whacking, overgrown and encroaching on the house gutters and roof. We raked and trimmed and the place is starting to get shaped up.

Saturday was so nice we decided to take a break and drive over Leipers Fork to eat at Pucketts, and afterward we strolled into some of the shops. Ran into a woman from Davenport who owns a boutique there. She actually lived in Muscatine until she was a year old - her dad taught at one of the middle schools - last name was Hughes. And her husband works for Nutro, same as Bruce. Freakishly small world!

Simple!

I've decided that food in the South is pretty simple.  There is no food pyramid since there are only 2 basic food groups...starch and sugar.  Oh wait, make it 3, because I forgot about fat.  It is wonderful! Everything tastes good. 

Thanksgiving was amazing - I don't understand why it's called comfort food when eating it causes discomfort...mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, potato salad, pumpkin pie, sweet potato pie, pecan pie and coconut cake. And of course, cornbread dressing (it would have been called cornbread stuffing if it had been stuffed in the turkey, but I was also informed by another source that then it would also be called food poisoning).  I'm learning so much!

Going to the grocery store is nothing short of an adventure.  One can find boxes of pork chitterlings, canned okra/ mustard greens/tomatoes, and other assorted items that don't appear regularly on shelves back in Iowa. I have not seen an Iowa Chop yet. I was feeling pretty worldly yesterday when a store associate asked me if I wanted a buggy, and thanks to my tutors, Gina and Linda, I expertly replied, "Yes, Sir, I do. Thank you." And I accepted the shopping cart and strolled away. Thanks, Friends! :)

Yea!

I was in the grocery store today AND RAN INTO SOMEONE I KNEW!!! It was great. Back in the dairy section my neighbor from across the street, 2 doors down called out a cheery greeting. Manna to my soul!  Also kept me from chatting to random strangers just so I'd have someone to talk to. :)  Bruce and I talked it over on the way down and we decided that no one is going to come to us, so we will have to be relentless and aggressive at introducing ourselves to people. I also called a group that reaches out to new transplants in town - hope to connect with them this weekend.

Bruce is a happy man - the TV people were here today and so his evenings have a little more normalcy. A little ESPN can do wonders for a guy. On a scale of 1-10, I'd say today was a 7, and not half bad!

Excitement!

Who knew it could be so exciting? I found another pair of earrings today - they were in my makeup bag.  I didn't realize that wearing the same pair of earrings for 8 days straight could cause crankiness - maybe it's because they are aqua.  One of these days I will discover the box that contains the rest of my collection.  But for today, I was pleased to have a choice!

At Barnes & Noble tonight for my daily infusion of internet connectivity. Bruce and I had planned on purchasing a dining room set to replace the set we left behind, however, I found that after weeks of constant decision-making, I was rendered unable to make a choice on the furniture. I should have gone shopping before we moved and before this temporary madness set in.  Speaking of madness, the M key on this computer has to be brutally depressed in order to work - cuts down on the WPM considerably. Also makes me want to find words without Ms in them.

Tomorrow the TV guy comes, and Friday the internet people. It's all good! I volunteered to make a green salad to bring to the Thanksgiving dinner at our neighbors - it was as though I had just announced that I was married to my brother.  Green salad is akin to a sacrilege at a Southern Thanksgiving dinner, apparently. :)

My Assignment for Today

I assigned myself the task of going to the local public library today to do normal tasks like sending email, posting on the blog and collecting information from the web.  I've already emptied several boxes this morning, and with a certain amount of industry, will have the kitchen and dining room completely intact by the end of today.

Visited an adult class yesterday after church where a man recovering from pneumonia quipped, "I've always told my wife that she was dearer to me than my next breath, however, when I found myself unable to breathe, she went to a tie."  I'm kinda there, gasping for that next breath figuratively, finding some sort of new identity and equilibrium in a place where I am unknown, my "normal" is in disarray, and nothing is easy yet. Hence, my assignment to get out of the house and go to a familiar, normal environment, the library. Had my first job in one, spent the better part of 9 years in one with home schooling and was on the library Friends board for 18 years.

It's weird, but in a way it's almost easier than church, because there are no expectations here, no doctrine to sort through and there is instant, unbiased fraternity, if that makes sense. I think I'm learning something really important about unconditional acceptance in a rather unconventional way today. Love it! 

Also realizing the power of gratitude today and the equally negative power of comparison. When my focus is comparing what was or what could be, or what others have including stuff, relationships, or whatever I think I should have instead of what I do have, I am vulnerable to the disease of bitterness, and blindness to God's incredible love and goodness. So my heart is in a place of peace today as I soak in the comfort and power of the love of God, and reject the insidious sense of entitlement and ingratitude that so easily distracts me from truth. "God's nearness is my good" and "in His presence there is fullness of joy."

So for today I have an internet connection, a quiet place where nothing needs to be done, and a place to sort out my thoughts. I've had my major "funeral" for the losses incurred in the move, so I'm glad to have that behind me - I'm sure Bruce is too. (OK, I'm sure he was a little worried when he found me on the floor of the big closet crying on Saturday.) I'll still have my moments, I'm sure.  "You're gonna LOVE it here!" is the mantra of Tennesseans. Can't wait for that to be true!

Quote for today: "Frogs have it made. They eat what bugs them."

P.S.

Splitting a half order of Mickeyroo's Bull Strings (very thin deep-fried onion rings) with Bruce last night for an appetizer was a really bad idea.  All day today it was a really bad idea...I didn't know my stomach could speak in tongues - at least it was a language I've never heard before...

Home in Franklin

OK, that's a lie.

It doesn't feel like home and it was actually a pretty rough day.  The movers didn't know what to do with our 40% reduction in storage, so the garage is pretty full right now.  I would post pics, but we don't have internet at the house and won't for another week or so, so this is a post from a neighborhood Starbucks. I think my brain has been sucked dry by decision-making for 8 straight hours.  But the good news is that 80% of the kitchen is put away and our bed is made, so tomorrow bodes well for a day of progress on the garage.

Wonderful new neighbors stopped over and brought subs and apple pie & ice cream tonight and invited us to join them for Thanksgiving. Amazing!  I've met two other neighbors so far and I'm hoping the fact that I have no personality right now (I think it's transplant shock) won't put them off too much.

So, we're off and running!  I'm grateful for the One Who formed and holds my heart - peace in the transition.

Sunny Day

Please note the terrible lighting in this photograph.

We are SO grateful for the myriad "small things" that have eased this journey, including the blinding sunshine today.  Our stuff has been staged in the driveway and the loading is taking a couple hours less than projected. There is no need to wrap and protect as would be necessary if it was, say, snowing, raining or sleeting.

Our wonderful neighbors have fed us, housed us, loaned me books for the trip and are feeding the cats until the new owner arrives.  It looks as though the planets have aligned and the paperwork will be completed to accommodate the pressure cooker schedule - load today, close on Ridgeview tomorrow, in Tennessee on Thursday and unload on Bancroft Way on Friday. Amazing!

We are truly grateful for the kindness of people and our God.

The Day Has Arrived!

The packers have arrived.  It isn't even 10:00 in the morning and half of my kitchen is in boxes already. Deja vu - it was an Atlas Van Lines truck that pulled up to the door before 8:00, the same van line that delivered us to the door here almost 20 years ago.  But the kids were 6, 5 and almost 2, instead of 25, 24, and 21.

It was easier 20 years ago - we weren't trying to figure out how to register a school car that was being stored in Iowa for a student "away" in Arizona who has no Iowa address and whose mail is being forwarded to Tennessee. Insurance for it has been interesting, too, to say the least. More hoops this time.

The cats are outside - I pulled Punky out from under the bed in our room, and Abby slept in a chair in the basement until the noise got bothersome. They are both outside now, Punky most likely under the front porch, cowering, and Abby is probably stalking rodents or mooching from the neighbors.

We are grateful for Carolyn & Al next door who are feeding and housing us tonight. Last time they fed us pizza was when we had the flood in the basement and they came to our rescue. (I'm seeing a pattern here.) Girlfriends are coming to clean tomorrow afternoon, and tomorrow night our small group will be eating tacos together and we'll stay with Gale & Dave. So appreciative for kind friends!

Curious

I'm trying to use up the food in the freezer, and yes, I thought it was curious that the ground beef patties I was cooking smelled like bacon.  They hadn't turned into a weird science project or freezer burned into something unrecognizable. They were plain old burgers but I could detect an unusual, distinct woody-smoky aroma.  I kept bending over to smell them, trying to determine if they really were the source. I even checked to see if I had scorched the front of my vest, but it was fine. And that was when I spotted the wooden spoon under the edge of the pan, resting up against the burner, smoking away.  Really was a nice touch!

The cats were vocal and excited that Bruce came home today - especially since he brought really yummy cat treats. It's one way to ensure a warm welcome. :)

Gettin' There

Yard raked.  Check.
Oven cleaned.  Check.
Freezer defrosted.  Check.
Piano has a new home.  Check.
Christmas letter written.   Check.
Extra furniture ready to give away.  Check.
Cats have spent 24 hours outside now. Check.

We're getting there!

Popcorn and cooked apples and an ice cream sandwich tonight. I can eat whatever I want these days, or more accurately, whatever is left in the house. And tomorrow I pick up Bruce from the airport, Sunday Michael moves out and Monday the movers arrive. Next week at this time, if all goes according to plan, I'll be sleeping in my own bed in our new house.

(This all still seems breathtakingly swift. I try not to think about it too much...)

The Final Push

I didn't post yesterday because it was a sad day for me and I don't like to bleed in public.

Today my hair looks good, I'm wearing colors that make me happy, and most significantly, I spent enough face time with Jesus to get some badly-needed perspective. It was a BEAUTIFUL day yesterday, with blue, blue skies, gorgeous trees - our subdivision was just plain lovely. I was feeling the loss acutely, of leaving friends, our home that embodies so much sweat equity and tender care, our cat companions of 12+ years and leaving familiarity, identity and "known-ness". Today I have the courage to embrace the pain that loss brings, in order to gain the benefit and growth that change brings. One day at a time!

So I'm almost finished cleaning out, and yesterday was the day to tackle the leftover malaria and parasite-induced diarrhea meds from various world travelers, the outdated cough syrup, aspirin and eye ointment.  The triple antibiotic ointment had an expiration date of 2003, but it seems to have been working fine the last time we used it. I was pretty amazed by the collection I accumulated.  (Took it to a local pharmacy for proper disposal, for those of you who were hoping I didn't flush it and thereby add it to the local aquifer. )

My thanks to Peggy who came and completely fumigated the hall bathroom yesterday - now that is a labor of love!

Death by Paperwork

No doubt, the process of moving over state lines competes for the highest honors for creating more jobs and paperwork and therefore the felling of more trees than, say, the U.S. government.

I'm at the place where I want to hurt myself.  Insurance companies (multiple, since I'm getting quotes), lawyers, title companies, realtors, abstracts, banks and county treasurers and recorders all want a piece of the action. For the upteenth time I've assured the asker that yes, it's true, Bruce and I share the same birthday and I did not misspeak. Over and over again, I assure agents that our 21-year-old student is not an ax murderer or cause for doubling the insurance premiums.

I realized the administrative nightmare was getting to me when Bruce called in last night and I wanted to play a version of the bad marriage game, "My Day was Worse than Your Day" or in my case, "My Life is Harder than Your Life." Haven't played that since I had small children who all decided to get a stomach virus and diarrhea on the same day. It's never a smart game to play and doesn't promote good communication, so I decided to suck it up and deal with this for another 5 days.  I'll make it.

For now, I'll just recite drivers license numbers or SSN until I fall asleep.

What day is it?

OK, that's how I really feel.  I had to check to see if I remembered to put on a (don't look, boys) bra this morning. Truly. I think I'm always trying to remember something - even though I have all kinds of lists. Putting on clothes wasn't on the list though. Oh well, this weekend I'm hanging out with my parents and sister, and that means fun. And Scrabble. Which is fun, too. I'm trying to use up the food in our freezer, so I'm taking a chicken-spinach lasagna and cherry cobbler dessert with the cherries Michael and I picked at the Finleys the day the tornado popped up over the bluff in July.  I drove home fast that day.

I want to know why it is that one small overlooked tissue in a sweatshirt pocket produces the equivalent of a shredded bath towel all over the clothes and in the bottom of my washing machine. Maybe it's the same principle as the loaves and fishes. I always wondered how Jesus did that.

Got my tutorial on how to translate and pretend I understand the "Southern" dialect last night at small group, which included the nuances of northern and southern Louisiana, deep South, Northern Florida (a.k.a. New Yorkers) and, of course, Tennessee.  They might just be some of the funniest people on the planet. My face still hurts from laughing. Ummm...that was a gift.

The Stars!

I've been told by more than a few people that there are a lot of recording stars living in the Franklin area. But they weren't on my mind this morning as I walked to the mailbox to get a few more details cared for by virtue of the U.S. Postal Service.

There was fall crispness in the air this morning before the sun was up, with just a sliver of the moon left in the sky. Orion, the constellation that graces the southwest horizon at this time of year was twinkling over the trees on the bluff.  And then it hit me like a ton of bricks - I'm going to be living in town now and I won't be able to see the stars as well because of all the street lights!  Ack!

I'm more enamored by the stars of the heavens than by the ones who make a living by entertaining people. However, a friend of mine challenged me to not be a reverse snob - to discount people just because they are famous.  So I'm open to loving stars...all of them!

White Rabbit

Today is the first day of the month, which means it is time to say "White Rabbit!" first in order to win. You don't really win anything, except bragging rights for having been first. I got Bruce with a text message between flights this morning, and think Pete will stumble on to the blog and get nailed, maybe Amy, too.  Em is taking written prelims today, so no chance of her coming up for air. (MJ can go several days without noticing that we are now in a new month.)

Sometimes I don't even say it. Sometimes I soap it on the bathroom mirror, or send an email with a pic. This was a particular favorite of mine - the white rabbit that was really a black rabbit and I added the message, "You've been duped."  Another fun one was the time I put a little pile of black beans on the floor in their rooms with a little note by the pile that said "White Rabbit," or maybe "White Rabbit was here." Don't exactly remember right now, but it was a ton of laughs. (If you're thinking those people are easily amused, you're right!)

My New-Old Life

Today I dusted off my 3-speed Raleigh Sprite, the bicycle I purchased with some of my first paychecks from the Ames Tribune back in 1977. It cost me $154 and I rode it to work for 7 years, except when inclement weather dictated it necessary to take CyRide.  The fender is still a little twisted from the neighbor on Hyland who didn't like sharing the carport with a bicycle, but other than that, it's still in pretty good shape. I  parked the bike when I was pregnant with Emily and I can't say I've done any significant riding since.

So now seems a good time to resurrect the bike riding habit - we'll be living about 2 miles from downtown, and biking for Saturday morning breakfast sounds like a fun excursion.  And the library is about 3 miles - a perfect afternoon outing to toodle along.  I have no interest in suffering from "biker buns" after a regrettable experience in Minnesota, and anticipate breaking myself in slowly!

What to do? What to do?

I told a friend this morning that I have been making decisions non-stop for 45 days, and I find it exhausting. I don't have trouble sleeping at night!  Today's dilemma:  Should I keep the fondue pot or chuck it quickly before the ESI truck gets here?  Last time we used it, for a "fun" and leisurely small group gathering, the guys groused so much about having to wait for each piece of meat to cook that I finally grabbed the bowls of meat and stir fried the beef and chicken just to shut them up. The fondue fiasco has become the poster child for bad group gatherings.  I have such fond memories of gatherings around fondue pots in the 70s - is life too busy and instant now?

I'm also trying to decide what to do with the card table and chairs - the table no longer smells like formaldehyde from the time we dissected baby pigs on it (thank you, Steve Love) and the seats fall off the chairs only if they are handled roughly. And I need to find out whose tub of dress up clothes still remain in the store room - definitely college-looking stuff, including black wig, farm caps, a lovely white robe and other miscellaneous items.  Dance Marathon, perhaps?  Claim it, kidlings!

A Gift

For those of you who have ever loved an animal, you will know how happy I am about this: the buyer of our home in Muscatine has agreed to "adopt" our cats, as well.  Punky and Abby have hunted the bluff their entire lives, and we thought it cruel to force them into a 700 mile car ride and expect them to live inside, or at least in a small fenced area in Tennessee.

I am amazed and grateful that they can continue to endear themselves to the neighbors by reducing the rodent population, and I trust they will be serene companions to their new caretaker. What a gift to my distracted, concerned heart!

Whipped Cream

So I've been separated from Bruce for a week now, and have resorted to the comfort afforded by eating whipped cream out of an aerosol can. It's fewer calories than actually eating, say, ice cream with fudge sauce, and there is something decadent about doing the forbidden, although I am not delusional to think that Bruce or the kids have not sprayed their mouths full of the stuff when I was not looking. 

They know that I am a germ-a-phobe and don't like drinking out of other people's glasses and would faint at the thought of using someone else's toothbrush. I also keep hand sanitizer in my purse for appropriate moments, like when we're encouraged to shake hands with people in church - especially when I just saw them cough or wipe their nose minutes before.  I just had the thought that it might be residual caution I developed when I was going through chemotherapy when my immune system was compromised and I had low white blood counts.  Anyway, I'm hardly ever sick, so there must be some benefit.

I spent most of Friday printing, signing, scanning and returning papers for purchasing our home in Franklin. There came a point after 45 minutes of trying to remind the computer and scanner/printer that they were supposed to be friends and talk to each other, rebooting several times with no success, that I laid my head down on the table and wanted to cry.  It just wasn't working, and I had 17 pages to get back to Bruce. I lifted my head and raised my voice to the Father and said, "You have to fix it - I can't and I don't know what else to do!  I need help!"  And I clicked on the Import button and the scanner started.  He is Lord over even the pathetic technology we have created here, and I am deeply grateful. Then I DID cry, but out of gratitude, not frustration.

Saturday my sister Rosemary came to help - I needed an unbiased opinion on sorting through the toys - and she provided wonderful moral support.  Plus, the Scrabble god smiled on me, she picked up an inordinate number of vowels and I got to put the X on a triple letter space, enough to push me over the top for the day. Scrabble, you know, is the Oliver Girls Game.

My Reason for Being Thankful Today

See, I can safely post this because I know Michael never reads this blog - he's living the adventure with me and he hates being given redundant information. Here he is in our disastrous "storage room," wearing Bruce's old FFA jacket, which Bruce declares, "fits MJ perfectly" although I have put a dashed line to show where the jacket actually hits him - the rest of the dark color is his t-shirt.  And you also can't see that if he flexed his muscles at all, the fabric would shred right off his shoulders.

I am so grateful for this young man who has really "manned-up" with Bruce gone, hauling dirt, raking leaves, cleaning out the gutters, muscling heavy stuff up the stairs, and remaining kind and gentle when I'm having a meltdown. He hauls himself out of bed every morning at 4:00 to put in his hours at a local manufacturing plant and comes home to help me with whatever project I'm working on. He's good company at mealtime, too.  He takes off for National Outdoor Leadership School in January, so he'll be living with friends in Muscatine for a couple of months. The timing has been wonderful, to have him here, "for such a time as this."

What an incredible blessing he has been in this segment of our journey - my reason for being thankful today.

Let's Make a Deal

Well, as happens in an ever-shifting real estate market, the seller of our chosen house declined our offer in hopes of getting a better one (good luck there) and while we are disappointed, we have moved on. 
 
So, we're looking behind Door Number 2 now, in hopes of finding a home.  This house is the same neighborhood, same floor plan - on steroids.  Much larger than we want or need. I keep pinching myself to see if there has been some mistake. It's a lovely home, 10 years old or so. At this point, it looks as though we have a deal, pending home and pest inspections.  

It has the same Florida room (windows on 3 sides) and a Master Bedroom suite that will accommodate pretty much all the furniture we have here in Iowa. My sister suggested that we could have a family sleepover and the Arentson family could all sleep in the master on air mattresses. It could happen!
 
The good news is, interest rates haven't been this low since the 1960s. I've always said, if I was in charge of our finances, we'd be living in a cave - with a mortgage. But, I'm married to Bruce, and keeping books is a hobby for him. So, I'm in good shape there. I'm guessing it wouldn't surprise anyone that he has the checkbook and computer down in Tennessee, and I just send him emails to let him know what I've spent. It's kinda creepy, though.  Tuesday night I stopped by Blain's Farm and Fleet at 8:42 and bought some walnuts and almonds, and when I talked to him at 9:10, he already knew it because he was doing books online.  It's a good thing I know he loves me or else I'd be paranoid.

So now it's the waiting game. While Bruce is in Tennessee, I am busily sorting and taking care of details on this end. That means I secretly throw things away.  Or give stuff away. (I'm truly proud of Michael. He took his extensive collection of Legos and gave them to the Flickinger Learning Center (at risk kids) here in Muscatine. He "gets it.") I did find the set of keys Bruce has been missing for 35 years. I put his high school letter jacket in the dryer on "air dry" to knock some of the dust out of it, and it sounded like the enamel was being bludgeoned from the dryer drum. I opened it to find said keys. Bruce told me that he used to have a tendency to lock his keys in the car...but if all else failed, he kept a piece of baling wire twisted around a sign post at school, so if he needed to, he could pick the door lock. 

Oh baby, times have changed!

SO not fair!

How come, with all this stress, Bruce lost 6 pounds and I GAINED 3?
It's just not right, I tell you! Something is twisted and diabolical in this universe.

Must be the 3 weeks I've spent in front of the computer doing recon work. I've looked at 200 houses online and researched dozens of other things. I've always told Bruce I would fare better than he would under siege. My clothes would still fit me long after he's wasted away to nothing.

Speaking of clothes, today I hung the James Sterling 1967 paper dress (complete with bag and floppy hat) out to air. It was packed away, a gag gift from my mom who pulled it out of a box and sent it to Bruce and me for our 1st wedding anniversary. I kept it in a cedar-lined trunk for 25 years, and think it is totally suitable for Emily for Halloween. If it were in pristine condition it would be worth $100 to someone who wanted it. (That's a big "if.")  I just wanted to be fair and tell you that Bruce isn't the only person who has squirreled away questionable stuff over the years. I'm tackling some of my own treasures before I go after someone else's.   Is that like taking the plank out of my own eye before pointing out someone's sliver?


Still trying to make a deal with  the sellers - I've discovered that "home" is where Bruce and I are, not an address. It was hard for me to leave him down in Franklin, and I'm eager to join him again soon, hopefully in a house - but I told him years ago that I'd live in a cave to spend life with him, and I still mean it. (Although indoor plumbing would be a definite plus!)

5 minutes

Five minutes - that's how much time I had to spare making my connection in Memphis this morning. The plane in Nashville got off 1/2 hour late with mechanical issues and I already had a close connection for my flight out of Memphis to Moline. So glad I made it - otherwise my 3-1/2 hour journey would have stretched into 14 or 16 hours since the only other flight into Moline drags in late tonight.

Arrived home to rake leaves, water plants and get mid-month bills in order. Tomorrow I'll start sorting in earnest. Funny thing, down-sizing means we are going to have less stuff, so some stiff-lipped, cold-hearted pitching is in order.  (NOT THE HARLAN LETTER JACKET AND FFA AND SHELBY COUNTY 4-H JACKETS!!!!) I'm seriously thinking one of the bedrooms is going to have to be Bruce's man cave. He can store the past 30 years of receipts in there too. And the ISU memorabilia and his collection of Kent trucks. And the computer desk he refuses to part with. Might have to put the TV and treadmill in there too. There you go - the room is completely outfitted. 

That was easy!

Maybe...

Well, we finished looking at homes around noon today, emailed our realtor with a bid on one of them and headed off to enjoy what was left of the afternoon.  We decided to meander up to Brentwood to kill time before the Saturday evening service at Brentwood Fellowship Bible Church (I'm flying out early tomorrow) and along Franklin Road we saw what must be some of the biggest houses in the free world.  What do people do with 15-20,000 square foot monstrosities like that???

Just as we were leaving Brentwood, my cell phone rang and it was Kim, our realtor, who said she had time to get our bid down formally - we were just a few miles from her building.  We programmed her address into lovely Carmen the Garman and spent an hour or so doing the legal stuff, so it's official now - we have a bid in.  The house is 2300 square feet with an open floor plan, 3 BR, 2-1/2 BA, all hardwood except the bedrooms.  Everything is on one floor so we can live here forever. :)

Bruce doesn't have much room for his table saw - no basements in this part of the country and it's only a 2-car garage, but we'll figure something if we can get a deal worked out. Maybe he can put up a shed in the back yard and keep some of his toys out there!

We'll see!!

The inhabitants

Truly, folks here are friendly.

In burning up a tank of gas in my neighborhood cruising I've been invited to join garden clubs, Bunko groups, reading clubs and to become walking companions. I've met Canadians, Floridians, and women from Alabama and South Carolina. They all read the "Southern Hospitality" manual and know how to use it. Nice!

Our Realtor is a tiny Korean, and 200% sheer adrenalin. Kim has worked hard for us - and made me understand that I don't think I would ever want to be a Realtor and deal with the head cases like me who are trying to adjust to a new life and find a house at the same time.  Amazingly, she hasn't killed me off yet in her frustration and remains ridiculously cheerful and upbeat.

Today Bruce and I prefaced our day's house hunting with an early, quick trip to the Carnton Plantation - I discovered the beautiful drive up to the house and Confederate cemetery yesterday on my gas burning excursion. I don't think I oversold it to him - Bruce enjoyed it as much as I did. Our new best friend is definitely the Garman. The streets of Franklin look like they were designed by a spider smoking reefers.  I'm still praying that God will heal my sense of direction - it is totally broken right now, with West is East and North is South. Ack!

We're heading out to play this afternoon. It's beautiful out - the trees are in raucous color and we both will benefit from their soul-healing beauty. Yippee!

A Breath of Fresh Air?

So we found a house that was a likely candidate yesterday, and this morning I dropped Bruce off at work and drove to see what morning traffic was like, checked out the neighborhood, and trolled the adjoining streets and chatted with the walkers. Very friendly people around here.

Yesterday I noticed a "burning plastic" sort of smell and we attributed it to someone getting rid of some trash. Today as I drove into the subdivision, (Franklin is a very small town - the surrounding farms were purchased and developed into multiple subdivisions) I noticed the smell again today, and after two hours of being there, I had a raging headache, my throat and chest hurt, and my eyes burned.  I went back to the apartment and got online to check out possible air quality issues and discovered that a wire plant about 1/2 mile from the neighborhoods we were investigating releases emissions of phenol (in compliance with the EPA).  There are petitions and grievances filed against the company, but no solution in sight.

I have a "fragrance allergy" and a common ingredient in perfumes and air fresheners is phenol.  Bummer!  But it was better to discover the issue before we signed a purchase agreement.  (It would only have been a problem when the prevailing wind was from the North or Northwest - or basically all winter.) The wind changed yesterday morning to the NW; otherwise, I would not have known about it. God is kind.

So tomorrow is Saturday, and I fly back to Iowa on Sunday. It will be interesting to see what God has in store for us, house-wise. I trust His timing - He is never late.

(Sometimes I do question His sense of humor, however!)

Need Rain? Call 1-800-BRUCEJO

It's true - just ask my folks how many times we've traveled to Bancroft for a weekend and the weather turned off poorly - either rain or snow. Or we went to the cabin of friends and wound up with snow (in October) or rain. Or the time we took the kids to Backbone State Park in mid-September and there were record lows (33 degrees) and rain so we had to sleep with the oven on, its door open, to stay warm.

And now, here in Franklin after 6 weeks of drought, we've apparently brought thunderstorms and overcast skies. I'm sure folks here were glad to see the rain, but it surely put a damper on looking at houses, not to mention getting outside to walk and explore. I'm starting to feel paranoid, but not nearly as much if we had come down here in early May when they had 17" of rain and record flooding!

So house hunting has turned up zeros so far.  We are grateful for the people who are praying for us and evidently keeping us somewhat sane. I am continuing to survive my identity crisis, the constant need for a compass - there are NO straight roads here - and "every day is a bad hair day."  I should have gotten a haircut before I left  Muscatine but I just didn't have time.  (This is about as girly as I get - I'm having a hair emergency and I broke my deodorant and had to use Bruce's Old Spice (sorry Pete - I know that grosses you out) but no ambulance is necessary.) I'm aware of a calming peace in the middle of all this chaos.

God is good and I know the story ends well!

"Toto, we're not in Kansas anymore"

For those of you who are wondering how Bruce is faring in this transition, he has quoted Dorothy from the Land of Oz as she looks in wonderment at a strange land of Living Color.  Leaving his homogeneous collection of Iowa work comrades, Bruce has entered an international world and there's a bit of culture shock that comes with it.

His boss is French, whose boss is German.  On his team are folks from England, Canada, Japan, and India. Gone is his office with a door, and "hello bullpen interaction and collaboration." No more piles of paper and stacks of files - everything is spotless at quitting time. Bruce is entering his 3rd day now, and starting to get his sea legs. He is gaining an ear for the new accents (we have yet to meet a native Tennessean) and doesn't need the GPS to get to work. He knows the first-30-days-plan and is looking forward to moving into it.

It's a brand new world, baby, and he's embracing it!

How Come?

So, of our "two good possibilities" houses, one already has a sale pending and the other is in short sale, with the net/net that it would be 60-120 days before it could be closed on. So we're on to the next two "good possibilities."

I woke up in the night asking, "Why did You give our house to someone else??" and "But I will trust You."

And I remembered the passage in Luke 5 where Jesus tells Peter to cast his net in the water, even though Peter has been fishing all night and caught nothing. Despite the fact that Peter is a professional fisherman, he does what Jesus asks, and the catch is so large that it starts sinking both his boat and that of his buddies. Peter leaves the catch of his life and falls at the feet of Jesus, uttering an acknowledgement that Jesus is more than human, and that Peter has no business being in the same space with Him. And (I think Jesus is laughing here) Jesus says, "Come, follow Me, and I will make you fishers of men." And Peter leaves everything and follows Him.

May it ever be so, Lord Jesus!

House Hunting

I was told that house hunting is the most fun part about moving. If that's true, kill me now.

Anybody who knows me, knows I'd rather take a stick to the head than shop. I like to go, get what I need, and go home. Period.

Home buying is like drug-crazed shopping that will put you in debt for 15 or 30 years. What's to like about that? No home is perfect, and they're in a continual state of deterioration from the day they're built. So I'm committed to "living in the land of Good Enough".  The mantra of this move is "Give me neither poverty nor riches" from Proverbs 30 - there is no room for perfectionism in living a peaceful life. (A perfectionist is a person who takes great pains...and gives them to others!)

So after viewing 15 or so homes over the past 2 days, I've whittled the list down to 2 good possibilities. Both are about 10-12 minutes to work for Bruce and about 15 minutes to the church we visited (profound, applicable and accurate teaching) and have the majority of things on our "want list." We didn't know we'd have to add $50K for a yard large enough that we couldn't shake hands with our neighbors through the side windows.  That was a rude awakening.

But we're learning. And Mom always said if you learned something, it was a good day.

Sunday Morning

Even though it's Tuesday night, I still want to talk about Sunday morning.

I had told Bruce when we woke up in the little corporate apartment he'd been assigned that I was pretty sure I'd lost my identity during the night. We'd had dinner in a funky downtown establishment, listened to some big label song writers sharing their craft in a side street coffee shop, and acted like we were tourists on vacation. But we were in Franklin to stay, not just here for a sweetheart retreat. And that sort of hit me Sunday morning.

I was still sure I was a Daughter of the King, the wife of Bruce, and mom to 3 amazing kids and a sweet daughter-in-love, but after that I was pretty fuzzy.  Back in Muscatine I didn't have to think about who I was.  I didn't have to wonder how I was defined, or how I would travel from Point A to Point B. I knew how I was connected to my neighbors, friends and community.

Here, I am unknown.  And that's a bit disconcerting.

So Bruce and I headed off to church even though I just wanted to crawl under a rock and be introspective. And I was stunned to hear the video interview of a volunteer whose "First Touch Ministry" is to reach out with compassion to new folks, "to know them and help their identities be known". (Ack! That women had been in my bedroom this morning!  She heard me say I'd lost my identity! How else could she know??) What a joy it was to hear someone validate my uncertainty, my angst.  She knew how I felt and wanted to help me - and she was Jesus with skin on to me.   I'm beginning to have new thoughts, tender thoughts, about refugees, immigrants and people who have faced trauma and change. And it's all good. I know I won't be the same for having had this experience of aloneness in the middle of many.

And my take away for the morning was an application to 1 John 4:19 "we love because He first loved us" - a challenge to wake up each morning and thank God for another day to be loved by Him. So easy for me to miss that. It is He who loves us and teaches us to love. I expect to be transformed.

The Vagabonds Arrive!

Bruce & I crossed the Ohio River into Kentucky on Sunday, October 10, 2010, and skirted the Cumberland River as we entered our new home State of Tennessee. What an amazing conflict of emotions!


I felt rising excitement as we neared Nashville, even as traffic screeched to a halt on I-24. An old car had burned up on the side of the road, causing a grass fire, backing up vehicles for miles. As we languished in the heat peering ahead for signs of movement, I began to feel very alone and unknown, stuck out in the middle of nowhere in this state where I only knew a couple of families.


After 45 minutes had passed, Bruce nixed my plan to go from car to car sharing our package of double-stuffed Oreos, but he did finally get out of the car to chat with the random strangers who were in the lane in front of us and on our right (of COURSE we were in the passing lane!)  The couple in the car next to us was from Marshalltown, IA, and the man knew the grandfather of the Missouri driver in front of us - in fact, he knew him well enough to tell us that the old guy always got #1 on his license plate. And the Missouri driver and his wife were at Iowa State at the same time as Bruce was, residents of the Towers and Richardson Ct., respectively. Unbelievable!


What an amazing set of circumstances to send a little comfort to us wandering vagabonds. God orchestrated a little bit of Iowa on an isolated patch of Tennessee highway, and what a delight it was to us!